'Wifey, please tek him back'

All Woman

REGGAE artiste Tanya Stephens, known for hits such as Nuh Ready Fi Dis Yet, It's a Pity, These Streets, Boom Wuk, What's your Story, Pon Di Side and After You , in her single Tek Him Back details a phone conversation between herself and the wife of a man she had poached, only to discover that all that glitters is not gold.

In the song, Tanya Stephens complained of the man's broken promises and laziness before begging his wife to take him back.

Unfortunately, the reggae singer's lyrical display has not been enough to ward off other women who poach men — some of whom later realised that their catch was not worth it. Some of these women share their stories below:

Shanna, 27, shop operator:

Well, my case is this, I was with the man; I controlled him most of the time, but the thing is that I didn't take him over. I would hype on the babymother though, because the man was spending on me. But then I later found out that he wasn't taking care of his kids, and I definitely had to send him home to his kids and woman because I don't do worthless men.

Nichola, 36, nurse:

It was years ago. I was fresh out of high school and I, being thick and an “original browning”, was the desire of almost every man I came in contact with. I soon found a man who was wine and dining me, and I really didn't have to ask for anything. I snatched him up even though I knew he was already spoken for. It was not just the money, it was also a certain feeling that came with “tekking” another woman's man.

Little did I know that what I was doing was relieving this woman of her crosses. It didn't take long for me to realise the big shot man that I had scored was nothing but a phoney. Yes, he was rich once, but things went bad and he was incurring debt and causing his family pain. He was living loan to loan and very soon things started caving in with me in the middle — the alcoholism and, eventually, he started hitting me.

I felt sorry for him, but I was going into my second year of university, there was nothing I could really do for him. I stayed around him as long as I could, but he was so toxic and I couldn't deal with that and school, and I told him. He handled it better than I thought and promised to stay away. He went back to the mother of his children, well, one of them at least, who eventually helped him out before he went back to his old ways.

Ashley, 32, teacher:

To be fair to myself, when we started out I didn't know that he was in a relationship. However, when I found out I didn't want to let go because to be very honest I had not felt the way he made me feel in a while. Anyway, things progressed and I made him choose because I didn't want to share him. Boy, was that the mistake of a century! I wound up pregnant and on my own before I could have our daughter. This man apparently thought that I was earning millions, because apparently teachers are “rich”.

Let me be clear, he didn't leave me, I left him, and I begged his babymother to free me of him. Thank God I can take care of my child, or she would be another on his list of children made but not cared for.

Michelle, 28, customer care representative:

When things started out I felt special, you know, an older man interested in me. And, of course, my motivation was the high life. Well, the high life brought with it sexually transmitted diseases and a whole list of things that I was not ready to deal with, including bringing shame to my parents. He was like a combination of all the plagues in Egypt in one because this man stalked me when I tried to get away from him and made up stories about me — the kind of behaviour you would only get from boys. He frustrated me so much until I had to call his wife, who bawled because she is a Christian woman who just could not tame him. I was sorry for her, but I was more focused on ridding myself of her husband.

— Penda Honeyghan




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