BAD habits are hard to break, but if a healthy, nurturing relationship is your New Year's resolution, then today is the last day for you to examine the history of your relationships for thorn-like habits that constantly stymie their growth.
Just in case you don't realise that your habits are toxic, relationship counsellor Wayne Powell has shared a list of bad relationship habits to ditch in 2019.
Not standing up for what you believe in
Stop discarding your values to accommodate your partner; if you feel uncomfortable or guilty afterwards, then you are doing yourself an injustice.
Turning a blind eye to your partner's toxic ways
You continuously ignore pieces of evidence that indicate your partner has some bad habits/behaviours that are detrimental to the relationship.
Dating married men
For some women, dating married men is a shameful act, but some women love being the other woman. This can hurt you more than you know, especially if you get attached. The possibility of a man leaving his wife to be with you is very slim, especially if he has kids.
Coming to the table empty-handed
Some women are still trapped in a culture where they expect a man to take care of them. A woman needs to ditch the habit of expecting a man to take care of her every financial need just because she is his woman. External and material factors should not drive your desire for engaging in a relationship.
Spending too much time plugged into your electronic devices
It's the technological era and one growing relationship killer is an attachment to our gadgets. Many couples spend more time on their phones than with each other even when they are in the same space. This can severely damage intimacy in a relationship and increase the possibility of major communication challenges.
Leaving your heart in charge
If you always allow your heart to take the lead, this most times will void all rational reasoning. This will lead to impromptu and careless decisions.
As soon as you are out of a relationship you tend to jump into rebound relationships to soothe your emotional pain and hurt. You often do this without doing the necessary healing work required and this is likely to cause you more pain and heartbreak.
Especially if you are a person who falls in love easily, stop engaging in casual office romances and flings that lead to personal distress and emotional hurt. If you are already in a relationship, you should avoid this altogether.
Using social media for venting
Social media is obviously the new therapy forum — it's where many couples, mostly women, are posting direct or indirect messages by way of memes or excerpts from popular songs or poems detailing the challenges they are having in their relationship instead of discussing them with their partners.
Expecting your partner to show affection first
This is a big problem in relationships. Both parties are guilty of expecting the other to show affection first. This can be problematic because sometimes your spouse may read that to mean that you are not emotionally available or that you are not into him or her when that is not the case. This can result in a lack of interest.