DATING is risky. It requires a lot of your time and energy, but there is no guarantee that the spark you feel will ignite into flames. When it doesn't, you may find yourself chasing people who will never reciprocate the love that you show them even though they keep stringing you along.
Are you worried that the person you're dating is just not on the same page? Relationship counsellor and sex therapist Dr Sidney McGill shares some red flags to indicate that your date may just be wasting your time.
He is always late
He is always late and it has become a pattern, but he always seems to have some excuse. Not only is this unacceptable, but it sends a clear message that he does not respect you or your time. You deserve better.
He spends a significant amount of time on the phone
While you are eager to enjoy the intimate time you share together getting to know him, it always seems that whatever he's doing on his phone is far more important. If he is really interested in time with you then he can put his phone away for a while.
He doesn't include you when discussing future plans
Even though you two have been dating for a while, he still refers to future plans such as children and building a house without making mention of you.
He talks a lot about himself
He doesn't seem to be interested in you or anything about you or even your views or concerns about topics being discussed.
He doesn't ask about your plans or goals
Even though you would love nothing more than sharing with him all that you aspire to achieve and how you intend to achieve your goals, he does not seem the least bit excited or interested to know these. It may be a clear indication that he has no intention of sticking around.
He shows little or no interest in your hobbies
He doesn't show interest in the things that you like doing even though you have taken the time to learn about his hobbies.
He doesn't invite you to meet his family
He is super close with his family but everytime they ask who he is with he says “a friend”, and leaves it there. Also, no matter how many family gatherings they have, he never invites you to them. While some people may take a little time to introduce a significant other to their family, if he keeps putting it off or avoiding the subject altogether, chances are he is not as serious as you think.
He is uncomfortable looking you in the eye
They say the eyes are the key to the soul and there are no two ways about it — even an extremely shy person, once they have an interest in a relationship with you, enjoys a soul to soul. If the man that you are dating expresses discomfort or seems uncomfortable whenever you are doing this, you should be concerned about how serious he is.
He avoids your family
When you are on your phone with your family, he gets super quiet. He also turns down invitations to hang out with your family and may go as far as to plan trips away from home if a relative is coming to visit so he doesn't need to come to see you during this period.
He is very defensive
Whenever there is a disagreement or you express a concern, he begins to play the blame game. He always presents himself as having superior ideas, and he never wants to entertain the idea of a compromise in times of decision-making or disagreements.